In my last column, I brought up one of RuPaul’s famous sayings, “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you going to love someone else?”. So, how do you go about that?
In this life, so many are just trying to be understood, find their “tribe”, be appreciated, and most importantly, be heard and seen authentically. To find this, in my current opinion, it’s more about knowing yourself, being truly honest with yourself, and finding the compassion for you (from within yourself) for the things you’re not all that happy about. So often we forget to be heard by our own self – with all its amazing, talented, and sometimes even messy, parts. What if we were to change all that, and what if all those parts were actually OK? What if instead we tuned-in to ourselves and instead of looking for external justifications for why we are here, we realized we are justified in who we are just for the simple fact that we ARE here?
One tool I have used over the years to help me cultivate this (I’m constantly working on this) is from Access Consciousness: “If I’m truly creating my life for me today, what could I choose right away?” For me, it brought up issues around self-worth like, “Am I worthy enough to ask?”, “Can I really put myself first?”. What shows up when you ask yourself that question? After asking that question, allow for the Universe to respond with an answer, then allow for the Laws of Attraction and Opposites to do their things, bringing what vibes, or things to help grow and further define and cultivate the beauty that you are bringing into your personal worldview.
Other resources: Brainspotting, IFS, EMDR, Traditional Naturopathy, Herbalism, Colorpuncture, and more! Find them in the “Edge Partner Directory”